Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life

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Simon and Schuster, Mar 3, 2015 - Health & Fitness - 416 pages
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An essential exploration of why and how women’s sexuality works—based on groundbreaking research and brain science—that will radically transform your sex life into one filled with confidence and joy.

Researchers have spent the last decade trying to develop a “pink pill” for women to function like Viagra does for men. So where is it? Well, for reasons this book makes crystal clear, that pill will never be the answer—but as a result of the research that’s gone into it, scientists in the last few years have learned more about how women’s sexuality works than we ever thought possible, and Come as You Are explains it all.

The first lesson in this essential, transformative book by Dr. Emily Nagoski is that every woman has her own unique sexuality, like a fingerprint, and that women vary more than men in our anatomy, our sexual response mechanisms, and the way our bodies respond to the sexual world. So we never need to judge ourselves based on others’ experiences. Because women vary, and that’s normal.

Second lesson: sex happens in a context. And all the complications of everyday life influence the context surrounding a woman’s arousal, desire, and orgasm.

Cutting-edge research across multiple disciplines tells us that the most important factor for women in creating and sustaining a fulfilling sex life, is not what you do in bed or how you do it, but how you feel about it. Which means that stress, mood, trust, and body image are not peripheral factors in a woman’s sexual wellbeing; they are central to it. Once you understand these factors, and how to influence them, you can create for yourself better sex and more profound pleasure than you ever thought possible.

And Emily Nagoski can prove it.
 

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User Review  - Krisbee - LibraryThing

Very informative and well written in an engaging style that is easily understood. Explains mind and body interactions with in depth instruction on body parts and functions. The chapter on stress is a must read. Read full review

LibraryThing Review

User Review  - antao - LibraryThing

Ficticious story... A young woman boards an airplane and sits in a row with a woman about 10 years her senior. As the plane takes off, the older women sneezes about 8 times in rapid succession. After ... Read full review

Contents

Yes You Are Normal
1
A Couple of Caveats
8
No Two Alike
15
Your Sexual Personality
42
And the One Ring to Rule Them All in Your Emotional Brain
70
Sex in a Monkey Brain
111
A SexPositive Life in a SexNegative World
153
Lubrication Is Not Causation
191
Actually Its Not a Drive
223
The Fantastic Bonus
265
The Ultimate SexPositive Context
293
Changing the Goal
324
Acknowledgments
337
References
367
Index
389
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About the author (2015)

Emily Nagoski is the award-winning author of the New York Times bestseller Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life, and the coauthor of Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle. She has an MS in counseling and a PhD in health behavior, both from Indiana University.

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