was mightily pleas'd from a Child with the Mufic of a

Drum.

GARDINER.

I wonder his Body was never found after the Battle.

BUTLER.

Found! Why, you fool, is not his Body here about the Houfe? Doft thou think he can beat his Drum without Hands and Arms?

COACHMAN.

"Tis Mafter as fure as I ftand here alive, and I veri ly believe I saw him laft Night in the Town-clofe..

GARDINER.

Ay! how did he appear?

COACHMAN.

Pho, Robin, I tell ye he has never appear'd yet but in the Shape of the Sound of a Drum.

COACHMAN.

This makes one almoft afraid of one's own Shadow. As I was walking from the Stable t'other Night without my Lanthorn, I fell across a Beam, that lay in my way, and faith my Heart was in my Mouth-I thought L had stumbled over a Spirit.

BUT LE R.

Thou might'ft as well have ftumbled over a Straw ;: why, a Spirit is fuch a little little Thing, that I have heard a Man, who was a great Scholar, fay, that he'll dance a Lancashire Horn-pipe upon the point of a Needle -As I fat in the Pantry laft Night counting my Spoons, the Candle methought burnt blue, and the fpay'd Bitch look'd as if fhe faw fomething.

COACHMAN.

Ay poor Cur, fhe's almost frighten'd out of her Wits,
GARDINER.

Ay I warrant ye, fhe hears him many a time and often

when we don't.

BUT

BUTLER.

My Lady must have him laid, that's certain; what ever it cost her.

GARDINER.

I fancy, when one goes to market, one might hear of fomebody that can make a spell.

COACHMAN.

Why may not the parfon of our parisk lay him?

BUTLE R.

No, no, no, our parfon cannot lay him.

COACHMAN.

Why not he as well as another Man ?

BUTLER.

Why, ye fool, he is not qualified-He has not taken

the oaths.

GARDINER.

Why, d'ye think John, that the Spirit wou'd take the law of him?-faith, I cou'd tell you one way to drive him off.

How's that?

COACHMAN.

GARDINER.

I'll tell you immediately [drinks]-I fancy Mrs. Abigal might fcold him out of the house.

COACH MAN.

Ay, fhe has a tongue that would drown his Drum, if any thing cou'd.

BUTLER.

Pugh, this is all froth! you understand nothing of the matter the next time it makes a noife, I tell you what ought to be done, I wou'd have the fteward fpeak Latin to it.

COACHMAN.

Ay, that wou'd do, if the steward had but courage.

GARDINER.

There you have it - He's a fearful man.

If I had as

much

.

much learning as he, and I met the ghost, I'd tell him his own! but alack what can one of us poor men do with a Spirit, that can neither write nor read.

BUTLER.

Thou art always cracking and boasting, Peter; thou doft not know what mischief it might do thee, if such a filly dog as thee fhould offer to fpeak to it. For ought I know, he might flea thee alive, and make parchment of thy fkin to cover his Drum with.

GARDINER.

A fiddleftic! tell not me -I fear nothing; not I! I never did harm in my life, I never committed murder. BUTLER.

I verily believe thee, keep thy temper, Peter; after fupper we'll drink each of us a double mug, and then let come what will.

GARDINER.

Why that's well faid, John, an honeft man that is not quite fober, has nothing to fear- Here's to yewhy how if he shou'd come this minute, here wou'd I ftand. Ha! what noife is that?

BUTLER and COACHMAN. Ha! where ?

GARDINER.

The devil! the devil! Oh no, tis Mrs. Abigal.
BUTLER.

Ay faith! 'tis fhe; 'tis Mrs. Abigal! a good mistake! 'tis Mrs. Abigal.

Enter A BIG A L.

ABIGA L.

Here are your drunken fots for you! Is this a time to be guzzling, when gentry are come to the house! why you lay your cloth? How come you out of the ftables? Why are not you at work in your garden?

don't

GAR

GARDINER.

Why, yonder's the fine Londoner and Madam fetching a walk together, and methought they look'd as if they should say they had rather have my room than my company.

BUTLER.

And fo forfooth being all three met together, we are doing our endeavours to drink this fame Drummer out of our heads.

GARDINER.

For you must know, Mrs. Abigal, we are all of opinion that one can't be a match for him, unless one be as drunk as a Drum.

COACHMAN.

I am refolved to give Madam warning to hire herself another Coachman; for I came to ferve my Master d'ye fee, while he was alive, but do fuppose that he has no farther occafion for a coach, now he walks.

BUTLE R.

Truly, Mrs. Abigal, I must needs fay, that this fame Spirit is a very odd fort of a body, after all, to fright Madam and his old fervants at this rate.

GARDINER.

And truly, Mrs. Abigal, I muft needs fay, I ferv'd my Mafter contentedly, while he was living; but I will ferve no man living, (that is, no Man that is not living) without double Wages.

ABIGA L.

Ay, 'tis fuch cowards as you that go about with idle ftories to difgrace the houfe, and bring fo many Strangers about it; you firft frighten yourselves, and then. your neighbours.

GARDINER.. Frighten'd! I fcorn your words. Frighten'd quoth-a! ABIGA L.

What, you fot! are you grown pot-valiant ?

GAR

GARDINER.

Frighten'd with a Drum! that's a good one! it will do us no harm, I'll answer for it. It will bring no bloodshed along with it, take my word. It founds as like a train-band Drum as ever I heard in my life. BUTLER.

Pr'ythee, Peter, don't be so presumptuous.
ABIGA L.

Well, these drunken rogues take it as I could wish.

GARDINER.

[Afide

I fcorn to be frightned, now I am in for't; if old Duba-dub fhould come into the room, I wou'd take him

BUTLER.

Pr'ythee hold thy tongue.

GARDINER.

I would take him - [The Drum beats, the Gardiner

endeavours to get off, and falls. BUTLER and COACHMA N.

Speak to it, Mrs. Abigal.

GARDINER

Spare my life, and take all I have.

COACHMAN.

Make off, make off, good Butler, and let us go hide

ourfelves in the cellar.

ABIGAL fola.

ABIGA L.

[They all run off

So, now the coaft is clear, I may venture to call out my Drummer-But firft let me fhut the door, left we be furpris'd. Mr. Fantome, Mr. Fantome! [He beats.] Nay, nay, pray come out, the enemy's fled I must speak with you immediately don't stay to beat a parley. [The back Scene opens, and discovers Fantome with a Drum.

FAN