THE DRUMMER; OR, THE HAUNTED-HOUSE. ACT I. SCENE I.. A Great Hall Enter the Butler, Coachman, and Gardiner T BUTLER. HERE came another Coach to Town laft Night, that brought a Gentlemanto en-quire about this ftrange Noife, we hear in the Houfe. This Spirit will bring a power of Custom to the George----If fo be: he continues his Pranks, I defign to fell as Pot of Ale, and fet up the Sign of the Drum. H 52 COACH COACH MAN. I'll give Madam warning, that's flat--- I've alway's liv'd in fober Families. I'll not difparage my self to be a Servant in a House that is haunted. GARDINER. I'll e'en marry Nell, and rent a bit of Ground of my own, if both of you leave Madam; not but that Madam's a very good Woman--- if Mrs. Abigal did not spoil her--- come, here's her Health. BUTLER. It's a very hard thing to be a Butler in a Houfe, that is difturb'd. He made fuch a Racket in the Cellar laft Night, that I'm afraid he'll four all the Beer in my Barrels. COACHMAN. Why then, John, we ought to take it off as fast as we can. Here's to you --He rattled fo loud under the Tiles laft Night, that I verily thought the House wou'd have fallen over our Heads. I durft not go up into the Cock-loft this Morning, if I had not got one of the Maids to go along with me. GARDINER. I thought I heard him in one of my Bed-pofts---- I marvel, John, how he gets into the Houfe when all the Gates are fhut. BUTLER. Why look ye, Peter, your Spirit will creep you into an Augre-hole:-- he'll whisk ye through a Key hole, without fo much as justling against one of the Wards. COACHMAN. Poor Madam is mainly frighted, that's certain, and. verily believes 'tis my Mafter that was kill'd in the laft Campaign. BUTLER. Out of all manner of queftion, Robin, 'tis Sir George. Mrs. Abizal is of Opinion it can be none but his Honour; he always lov'd the Wars, and you know was was mightily pleas'd from a Child with the Mufick of a Drum. GARDINER. I wonder his Body was never found after the Battle.- Found! Why, you fool, is not his Body here about the Houfe? Doft thou think he can beat his Drum without Hands and Arms? COACHMAN. 'Tis Mafter as fure as I ftand here alive, and I verily believe I saw him last Night in the Town close, GARDINER. Ay! how did he appear? COACH MAN. Like a white Horfe. BUTLER. Pho, Robin, I tell ye he has never appear'd yet but in the Shape of the Sound of a Drum. COACH MAN. This makes one almoft afraid of one's own Shadow. As I was walking from the Stable t'other Night without my Lanthorn, I fell across a Beam, that lay in my way, and faith my Heart was in my Mouth---- I thought I had stumbled over a Spirit. BUTLER. Thou might'ft as well have ftumbled over a Straw; : why, a Spirit is fuch a little little Thing, that I have heard a Man, who was a great Scholar, fay, that he'll dance ye a Lancashire Horn-pipe upon the point of a Needle--As I fat in the Pantry laft Night counting my Spoons, the Candle methought burnt blue, and the fpay'd Bitch lock'd as if she saw fomething. COACHMAN. Ay poor Cur, fhe's almoft frighten'd out of her Wits. GARDINER. Ay I warrant ye, fhe hears him' many a time and often when we don't. BUT.. BUTLER. My Lady must have him laid, that's certain, whate ever it cost her. GARDINER. I fancy, when one goes to market, one might hear of fomebody that can make a spell. COACHMAN. Why may not the parfon of our parish lay him? BUTLER. No, no, no, our parson cannot lay him? Why not he as well as another man ? BUTLER. Why, ye fool, he is not qualified--- He has not taken the oaths. GARDINER. Why, d'ye think John, that the Spirit wou'd take the law of him?--- faith, I cou'd tell you one way to drive him off, How's that? COACH MA N.. GARDINER.. I'll tell you immediately [drinks] - I fancy Mrs. Abigal might fcold him out of the house. COACHMAN. Ay, he has a tongue that would drown his Drum, if any thing cou'd, BUTLER. Pugh, this is all froth! you understand nothing of the matter--- the next time it makes a noise, I tell you what ought to be done,-- I would have the steward fpeak Latin to it. COACH MAN. Ay, that wou'd do, if the steward had but courage.. There you have ir - He's a fearful man. If I had as much |