action, and the terror of leaving either diffatisfied, made independence burthenfome, and unlimited power a grievance.

The happiness or mifery which awaited her refolution, were but fecondary confiderations in the prefent flate of her mind; her confent to a clandeftine action fhe lamented as an eternal blot to her character, and the undoubted publication of that confent as equally injurious to her fame. Neither retracting nor fulfilling her engagement could now retrieve what was paft, and in the bitterness of regret for the error fhe had committed, the thought happinefs unattainable for the remainder of her life. In this gloomy defpondence paffed the night, her eyes never clofed, her determination never formed. Morning, however, came, and upon fomething to fix was indifpenfable.

She now, therefore, finally employed herfelf in briefly comparing the good with the evil of giving Delvile wholly up, or becoming

his for ever.

In accepting him, fhe was expofed to all the displeasure of his relations, and, which affected her moft, to the indignant feverity of his mother: but not another obftacle could be found that seemed of any weight to oppose him.

In refufing him fhe was liable to the derision of the world, to fneers from strangers, and remonftrances from her friends, to becoming E 3 a topic

.

a topic for ridicule, if not for flander, and an object of curiofity, if not of contempt.

The ills, therefore, that threatened her marriage, though moft afflicting, were least difgraceful, and thofe which awaited its breach, if lefs ferious, were more mortifying.

At length, after weighing every circumftance as well as her perturbed fpirits would permit, fhe concluded that fo late to reject him muft bring mifery without any alleviation; while accepting him, though followed by wrath and reproach, left fome opening for future hope, and fome profpect of better days. To fulfil, therefore, her engagement, was her final refolution.

CHA P. VII.

AN EVENT.

SCARCE lefs unhappy in her decision than in her uncertainty, and every way diffatisfied with her fituation, her views and herfelf, Cecilia was ftill fo diftreffed and uncomfortable, when Delvile called the next morning, that he could not discover what her determination had been, and fearfully enquired his doom with hardly any hope of finding fa

vour.

But

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But Cecilia was above affectation, and a ftranger to art. "I would not, Sir," fhe faid, keep you an inftant in fufpenfe, when I am no longer in fufpenfe myself. I may have appeared trifling, but I have been nothing lefs, and you would readily exculpate me of caprice, if half the diftrefs of my irrefolation was known to you. Even now, when I hefitate no more, my mind is fo ill at eafe, that I could neither wonder nor be difpleafed fhould you hefitate in your turn."

"You hesitate no more ?" cried he, almoft breathless at the found of thofe words, "and is it poffible--Oh my Cecilia!-is it poflible your refolution is in my favour ?"

"Alas!" cried fhe," how little is your reafon to rejoice! a dejected and melancholy gift is all you can receive!"

"Ere I take it, then," cried he, in a voice that fpoke joy, pain, and fear all at once in commotion," tell me if your reluctance has its origin in me, that I may rather even yet relinquish you, than merely owe your hand to the selfishness of perfecution?”

"Your pride," faid the, half fmiling, "has fome right to be alarmed, though I meant not to alarm it. No! it is with myself only I am at variance, with my own weakness and want of judgment that I quarrel, —— in you I have all the reliance that the highest opinion of your honour and integrity can give me."

This was enough for the warm heart of Delvile, not only to restore peace, but to awaken rapture. He was almost as wild with delight, as he had before been with apprehenfion, and poured forth his acknowledgements with fo much fervour of gratitude, that Cecilia imperceptibly grew reconciled to herself, and before fe miffed her dejection, participated in his content

ment.

She quitted him as foon as fhe had power, to acquaint Mrs. Charlton with what had paffed, and affift in preparing her to accompany them to the altar; while Delvile flew to his new acquaintance, Mr. Singleton, the lawyer, to requeft him to fupply the place of Mr. Monckton in giving her away.

All was now haftened with the utmost expedition, and to avoid obfervation, they agreed to meet at the church; their defire of fecrefy, however potent, never urging them to wish the ceremony fhould be performed in a place lefs awful.

When the chairs, however, came, which were to carry the two ladies thither, Cecilia trembled and hung back. The greatness of her undertaking, the hazard of all her future happiness, the difgraceful fecrefy of her conduct, the expected reproaches of Mrs. Delvile, and the boldness and indelicacy of the step she was about to take, all fo forcibly ftruck, and fo painfully wounded her, that

the

the moment fhe was fummoned to fet out, fhe again loft her refolution, and regretting the hour that ever Delvile was known to her, fhe funk into a chair, and gave up her whole foul to anguifh and forrow.

The good Mrs. Charlton tried in vain to confole her; a fudden horror against herself had now feized her fpirits, which, exhaufted by long struggles, could rally no more.

In this fituation fhe was at length furprised by Delvile, whofe uneafy aftonishment that fhe had failed in her appointment, was only to be equalled by that with which he was ftruck at the fight of her tears. He demanded the cause with the utmost tenderness and apprehenfion; Cecilia for fome time could not speak, and then, with a deep figh "Ah!" fhe cried, "Mr. Delvile! how weak are we all when unfupported by our own efteem! how feeble, how inconfiftent, how changeable, when our courage has any foundation but duty!"

Delvile, much relieved by finding her fadness sprung not from any new affliction, gently reproached her breach of promife, and earnestly entreated her to repair it. "The clergyman," cried he, “is waiting; I have left him with Mr. Singleton in the veftry; no new objections have started, and no new obstacles have intervened; why, then, torment ourselves with difcuffing again the old ones, which we have already confidered E 5

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